TIN #045 - Why I Ignore CEOs and Celebrities
The Hidden Power of Networking with 'Little Friends"
Greg here!
Last Saturday, an interesting thing happened to me.
And, it was a great reminder about networking mindsets.
I wanted to share the story and the lesson with you.
This week’s issue which takes about 3 minutes to read.
Everyone wants to meet important people when they start networking.
The premise is people who are well-known have lots of connections to share with you.
But these people are usually the hardest to connect with. Everyone wants to meet them.
My advice:
You don't need to meet important people to network.
No CEOs, CFOs, COOs, CHROs, or anyone with a C in their title.
No famous influencers or celebrities.
Ignore these people and focus on “little friends.”
Just because someone isn't the CEO or head of the company, doesn't mean they aren't worth spending time on.
You never know who might help you someday.
I was reminded of this lesson last weekend.
The Lion and the Mouse
In my book, The Fast and Easy Guide To Networking For Introverts, I use the fable of the Lion and the Mouse to emphasize the importance of connecting with all kinds of people:
“Once when a Lion was asleep, a little Mouse began running up and down upon him; this soon awakened the Lion, who placed his huge paw upon him, and opened his big jaws to swallow him.
"Pardon, O King," cried the little Mouse: "forgive me this time, I shall never forget it: who knows but what I may be able to do you a turn some of these days?"
The Lion was so tickled at the idea of the Mouse being able to help him, that he lifted up his paw and let him go. Sometime after the Lion was caught in a trap, and the hunters who desired to carry him alive to the King, tied him to a tree while they went in search of a wagon to carry him on.
Just then the little Mouse happened to pass by, and seeing the sad plight in which the Lion was, went up to him and soon gnawed away the ropes that bound the King of the Beasts. "Was I not right?" said the little Mouse:
Little friends may prove great friends.”
This story came back to me last weekend during a concert at Red Rocks.
The Concert
For those of you who don't know, Red Rocks is a natural amphitheater outside of Denver. It's iconic on the concert scene and incredibly famous musicians rank it as one of their favorite places to play.
Last Saturday, Old Dominion played there.
My wife knows one of the sound men on the tour. He knew he was going to be in Denver, so invited my wife and I to the concert.
She worked with him over 20 years ago at a theatre in Myrtle Beach, SC.
Over the years, she stayed in touch with him, loosely, through social media.
Last year, he was in Denver on a different tour, and he reached out to my wife. They got together for coffee and to catch up on life.
Here's the important thing:
When my wife worked with him in Myrtle Beach, he wasn't a sound man.
He was a stage hand.
That’s a big difference in the world of live entertainment.
He set up and tore down sound equipment each night.
He was definitely lower on the ladder of techies for a show.
But my wife, who was one of the featured singers in the show, said she always tried to talk to him and make him laugh.
She never thought of herself as “above” the stage hands.
Of all the people he worked with over the years, of all the singers and dancers and performers, my wife was one of the people he wanted to stay in touch with because she was kind and made him laugh.
When he went on tour and saw Denver on the list of stops, he thought "Who do I know in Denver?"
He thought of my wife and contacted her about coming to the show.
He said he could get us tickets. Old Dominion is a popular country music band and they put on a good show. They aren’t on the top of our playlists, but we said yes to the show because it was free, her friend wanted to say “hello”, and it was at Red Rocks.
Free tickets would have been enough for us, but he got us back stage passes as well.
We got to skip the lines getting into the show and got to eat and drink back stage with the band.
The biggest thrill of the night was being able to watch the opening acts from the wings of the stage. We got and look out into the Red Rocks crowd and see what the performers see.
Here’s what it looked like!
I can understand why so many performers list Red Rocks as one of their favorite places to play.
As we were leaving the concert, I told my wife, "See, it's always important to give kindness to others because you never know when they will become someone important who can get you back stage at Red Rocks."
She said, "That's not why I was nice to him. I didn't do it because I thought some day he would be important. I did it because it was the right thing to do.”
The Lesson
I’ve talked about a Giving Mindset in TIN #004 - How To Make Networking Feel Good.
Most of us think of networking as something that is mutually beneficial to both people.
We think, "We're going to help this person because some day they will help me."
There isn't anything wrong with that mindset.
But I would urge you to consider giving kindness to others not because they will give you something someday, but because it's the right thing to do.
It may come back to you in the form of back stage passes or it may never come back to you.
Either way, giving kindness to others is it’s own reward.
Before You Go
You can make a connection with anyone.
One framework I like to use is the “+ - =” approach.
I wrote about this on LinkedIn last week. I believe this is a great way to start figuring out who you can connect with in your network.
Check it out!
I post on LinkedIn every week day. I’d love you to follow me so you can see all my networking stories and tips.
One more thing!
A few years ago, I wrote an article on Medium about the loss of civility in our world and how we can each do a little bit each day to make the world a better place.
The story of my wife’s kindness for her friend reminded me of it and I’d love to share it with you: