TIN #022 - How to network like George Bailey
What you can learn about connection from a classic Christmas movie
Good morning and Merry Christmas Eve!
This issue is being published on December 24, 2022.
Whether you celebrate Christmas or not, please accept my gratitude for being a regular reader.
Today, I’m sharing one of my favorite Christmas movies and what it can teach us about networking.
This issue takes about 3 minutes to read.
But first,
A message about The Go-Giver.
Everyone is looking for a way to get extraordinary results, but most don’t realize they need to give exceptional value first.
That's why I love The Go-Giver.
It's a series of books written by Bob Burg and John David Mann that explains this important mindset shift.
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Who is George Bailey?
“It's a Wonderful Life” is one of my favorite Christmas movies. Each year, I watch it.
Every year, it gets me choked up.
As I was writing this issue, I did some research on its themes and historical impact.
If you know the movie, you may be surprised to learn there are a bunch of people who don't like this movie for a lot of reasons.
Well, to each his or her own.
If you’re not familiar with the movie, here’s a quick summary from my friend ChatGPT:
“"It's a Wonderful Life" is a classic Christmas movie directed by Frank Capra, released in 1946.
It tells the story of George Bailey, a kind-hearted man who has always put the needs of others before his own.
When he finds himself facing financial ruin and personal despair, George contemplates suicide, but is visited by a guardian angel named Clarence, who shows him what the world would have been like if he had never been born.
Through a series of flashbacks and alternate realities, George sees how much he has affected the lives of those around him and realizes the true value of his own life.
With the help of Clarence and his loved ones, George is able to overcome his troubles and find happiness.”
There are a lot of reasons why I love this movie.
But, this morning, I want to talk about how one of the themes of the movie ties into our mindsets about networking.
Giving
I'm a big believer in giving in networking.
Before getting.
And it can be hard to focus on giving because most of the time, we’re trying to get something, a job, an opportunity, or important connection from our networking efforts.
We are networking to make progress toward our own goals.
But we need to remember George Bailey.
He had a lot of his own goals, too.
He wanted to travel the world and become someone important. In his head, these things were the definition of success.
But the events of his life forced him to follow his heart and help the people in his hometown of Bedford Falls.
Throughout his life he gave to others at the expense of his own goals.
And what happened?
When he really needed it, all those people came back to give to him.
How does this apply to networking?
George helped those around him: family and friends, but also people he did business with. He gave to the people who were near to him. Often we think we need to network with strangers, but we have plenty of people we can help who are in our lives everyday.
He gave to others at his own expense. I’m not saying you need to sacrifice everything, but sometimes, it may take your time to give. It can feel wasteful to give up this valuable resource, but its value is what makes it meaningful to others. It makes them want to give back to you.
He didn't know when the giving would come back to him. In fact, he never expected it to come back. But it did because that’s how reciprocity works. Give without expecting anything in return and it will come back in orders of magnitude.
Your situation probably isn't as dramatic as George’s, but the lesson is still the same.
Give first and give without expecting people to give back.
Remember from TIN #004 what you can give to others as you network:
Advice - What have you learned? Give the knowledge.
Introductions - Who do you know? Connect people.
Recommendations - What works for you? Share it.
Why giving works
Giving helps you feel less awkward about networking because you aren’t asking your connection for anything. You won’t feel like you are taking advantage of him or her.
Most importantly, you won’t ever have to ask for anything.
After you have given something to the other person, Cialdini’s Principle of Reciprocity kicks in.
If you still aren’t convinced that giving is the best way to get what you want in life, I urge you to check out The Go-Giver by Bob Burg and John David Mann.
This is a recommendation I am giving to you.
Its message will reinforce the importance of giving in all your personal and professional relationships.
Have a great holiday weekend!