TIN #063 - How To Overcome Your Fear Of Networking
Use The Golden Rule of Networking To Beat Your Anxiety
Hey there, fellow introverted networkers!
In this issue, I want to address a topic that hits home for many of us:
How to conquer our networking fears.
In my journey to help introverts become ace networkers, I've noticed a common theme – the fear factor.
So, let's tackle these self-imposed hurdles and get you on the path to successful networking.
This issue takes about 4 minutes to read.
But Before We Get Started…
Each week, I post a new podcast with tips you’ll find in the weekly newsletter and bonus stories, wisdom, and motivation. The Introverted Networker podcast is like the weekly newsletter but with additional narration and thoughts from me. Be sure to listen to this week’s podcast and check out the previous episodes of the podcast as well.
The video version of the podcast is available on my YouTube channel.
What Are We Afraid Of?
When it comes to networking, our fears stop us from taking action.
But what are we afraid of?
Many of you have expressed concerns about bothering people when you reach out.
You believe sending an email or setting up a phone call or in-person meeting will be an imposition on the people you want to connect with.
The truth is, it's a common worry.
We're hardwired to seek acceptance and fear rejection, but let's change that perspective.
Because it’s ruining your networking progress.
Change Your Mind To Eliminate Your Fears
We often suffer from the "spotlight effect" – thinking everyone's watching our every move. This is a common cognitive bias. We all fall into this trap.
In reality, most folks are too preoccupied with their own issues to pay that much attention to us.
If you think about the fact most people aren’t actually concerned with what you do, it takes some of the pressure off reaching out to people.
The worst case scenario: The person you reach out to doesn’t respond.
That’s disappointing, but all it means is you’re in the same place as you were if you never reached out to that person.
Best case: They respond and you start talking. There’s little downside to making that connection request or sending that email.
The Golden Rule of Networking
Another way to get over your fear of networking is to remember the universal "Golden Rule"
Treat others as you'd want to be treated.
In networking, think about it like this: Step into Their Shoes
When reaching out to someone, think about how you'd feel if the roles were reversed.
If you were the person you are reaching out to, would you like to receive the message you are sending?
Chances are, you'd appreciate the effort, right?
Think about a time when someone you know but have lost touch with sends you a message or email that says, “Hey, I thought of you the other day and wanted to see how you were?”
Did you get offended by that message?
Did you feel like the other person was imposing on your time?
Did you want to tell the other person to leave you alone?
Probably not.
You likely thought, “I’m so glad that person sent me a note. I feel special she thought of me. I’m also glad she made the effort to send me a note. I’d love to catch up.”
If that’s how you’d feel, there’s a good chance that’s how the person you connect with will feel.
When you think about it like that, doesn’t it remove some of the fear you have about networking?
A Few Final Reminders:
Always Offer Value - The Power of Giving: Instead of focusing on taking from others, think about what you can provide. By approaching networking with a mindset of giving, you'll see more doors opening for you.
Patience Pays Off - The Long Game: Keep in mind that networking is a marathon, not a sprint. If someone doesn't respond immediately, don't lose heart. People get busy, and they might just circle back when they have the time.
A Reminder to Keep Trying - Never Give Up: Rejection and non-responses can be discouraging, but don't give up. Tweak your approach, and keep reaching out. It's a process, but the rewards are worth it.
Final Thoughts
Embrace the Fear. Understand that networking fears are common, but they don't need to hold you back. By changing your perspective, you'll soon find networking less intimidating.
As always, I'm here to help you become a better networker. Share your networking struggles and successes. Your feedback helps me serve you better.
Have a fantastic week, introverted networkers! I hope you make some exciting new connections. I'm here to support your networking journey. Go out there and meet some fascinating people!